None For Myself
by feathered moon wings
Summary: Charles Xavier doesn't have hope anymore, he's given all he has, he's spent. More than anything, Logan needs him to have hope again, because without it, what will become of their future? Charles and Logan have a conversation, Logan tries to restore a broken man to a semblance of what he used to be (or will be).


**None For Myself**

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Challenge:

"I've always hated thunderstorms." – Weather

"Alcohol isn't going to solve your problem." – Angst

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Charles was sprawled across the window sill, comfortable amongst the fluffy cushions in his unkempt state. He had a bottle of whiskey resting on his lap between his thin fingers and an absent gaze as he looked out the window.

Logan leaned against the frame of the double doors of the old fashioned sitting room as he watched the man he'd come to respect like no other at his lowest and most ragged point.

Outside, the sky cracked with thunder and the man from the future shifted uneasily. Charles turned his head slightly, noticing his presence.

"Something the matter?"

Logan shifted again and repositioned himself against the doorframe.

"I've always hated thunderstorms," he said simply.

The younger man chuckled slightly at that.

"Never would have pegged you as being afraid of such mundane things as storms," Charles said, taking a swig from the bottle.

"Yeah well…" Another crack of thunder hit the sky and the gray day illuminated for a moment. Logan cracked his knuckles absentmindedly as his senses vibrated at the loud noise "They make me uneasy." He explained.

He thought of Ororo and her great white hair and powerful demeanor and smiled slightly. "Most of the time, at least."

His words had a fondness that Charles was able to catch despite his inhibited state.

The professor turned away and stared at the rain as it fell over the estate grounds. He winced in pain and brought a hand up to cover his eyes, trying to gently massage the pain away. He took another sip from the bottle after a while and winced too at the burn in his throat.

"You know…" Logan hesitated for a moment "Alcohol ain't gonna solve your problem, Prof."

"Ha." Charles laughed bitterly "Well, it's not going to make it any worse than it already is I can assure you, so-" he swung the bottle to his lips almost defiantly.

"You a child or something'?" Asked the older man, not surprised when he didn't get an answer to that.

With a grumble he walked to the window seat and dragged a chair close, flopping down on it when he reached the alcoholic loser that would be his friend in the future.

"I don't-" Charles swallowed; he kept looking at the window and the gray day, avoiding the visual confrontation. "I don't know what you want me to do. How you want me to solve this… apocalyptic problem you have."

"I don't know either," Logan sighed tiredly "What I _do_ know is that we need you. We need you to hope for the future again, for people." His words sounded so sappy to his ears.

Jean would know how to help the Professor, Ororo too; they'd know the right words and the right intonation. They'd probably reach out to comfort this broken, fragile shell of a man. Everyone was so much better qualified for this job than him. Even Scott wouldn't have been half as bad. But there is no more Jean, no more Scott. There are so few left of them.

Charles coughed out a strangled laugh and hid his face in his hands.

"I remember once it used to be as easy as breathing," he chuckled. "But I'm spent Logan, I don't have any more to give." He looked at the whiskey bottle tiredly.

"Professor," The man from the future shook his head. "You don't know how much more you are able to give." There was a tread of his awe for Xavier slipping through.

"But isn't it enough?" For the first time Charles looked at him. "How much more hope and energy and love can I give away before it's enough for everyone else? Until I have nothing left to give? I don't even have any for myself anymore."

Logan didn't have an answer for him.

"I'm spent, and I don't know how long it'll be until I have enough will to even get myself going."

The older man hesitated a moment and cracked his knuckles again. With a sigh, he lifted his hand and placed it on top of Charles own. The young man startled and looked at Logan, his hand was very warm and the professor's very cold.

"A long time from now, you'll have enough hope to make a man more animal than person hope for a brighter future again. Not just one man," Logan looked into his scared ocean blue eyes. "But so many more. Children who will be helpless and without a home and above all, they will be hopeless. You'll give them everything you have and more, and in return they'll give you hope too in a-" The immortal shook his head. "Never ending circle of kindness. And you know what?"

Charles's sad eyes filled with unshed tears.

"What?" He rasped.

"It'll be more than enough." Logan squeezed the cold fingers with feeling and the young man let out a breath.

Charles closed his eyes and smiled ruefully. "I give hope to man. I keep none for myself." He said with a tiny, tired smile.

"Tolkien, right?" Chuckled the older man.

"Oh?" The Englishman's eyebrows rose curiously.

"You'll tell me where it's from in the future." Logan gives the professors' hand one last squeeze before letting go.

"I still can't wrap my head around that one." Charles set the bottle of whiskey on the floor.

"Trust me prof. It won't always be like this." Logan nodded to the dark and empty room. "You'll love the future." He smiled slightly.

"Hm." Charles looked out at the vast green grounds, soggy with rain but vibrant with life because of it. "I hope so."

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**Abril: Challenge I did with fellow friend and writer Shadow-ying. Who turns out **_**also**_** did his challenge about Logan and Charles, which I'm immensely happy about because I adore this two with a passion.**

**The challenge was to send the other one 2 starter quotes for them to mash up and use in a one-shot. For a moment it was harder than expected but then BAM inspiration.**

**If you liked this story I have another one set in the Logan movie. Go check it out!**


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